30 Tips for Coping with Holiday Grief

candle lightThe holidays can bring up all sorts of emotions: joy, anxiety, depression and grief, especially if you’re missing a loved one, or if a loved one is a shadow of their former self.

You are entitled to feel any and all emotions as they arise. If you’re at a holiday party and the tears well up, simply excuse yourself until you’re ready to rejoin the group. If you’re overcome with fatigue and grief and simply can’t make it to a party, it’s okay. Make yourself a bowl of popcorn and watch a movie or read a book. But keep in mind that socializing might do you a world of good. The most important thing is that you do what’s best for YOU. So whatever you need to do in order to get through the holiday season, do it in a healthy way. Please don’t rely on alcohol or drugs to numb your feelings.

Here are some suggestions for feeling your emotions and feeling your best, while remembering your loved ones during the holidays and beyond.

  1. Be honest with yourself and with others. Tell them what you’d like to do and what you’d prefer not to do.
  2. Create a new tradition in honor of your loved one, i.e. if you typically hosted a dinner, set a place setting and serve your loved one’s favorite dish.
  3. Decide where you want to spend the holidays. Maybe go to a new place or take a trip with another widow or widower whom you met in a support group.
  4. If you’ve had a hard time discarding your loved one’s clothes, think about donating them to a homeless shelter, etc.
  5. Start journaling. It’s a wonderful way to express your feelings and get things off your chest.
  6. Write a letter to your loved one and express your love, your sadness, grief, guilt, etc.
  7. Place two chairs facing one another. Sit in one and speak out loud the words you would like to express to your loved one. Tell him or her how much you miss them, or express your anger and guilt, etc.
  8. Watch what you eat. You should definitely enjoy your favorite foods, but don’t use grief as an excuse to overindulge in foods that aren’t good for you.
  9. Splurge on a gift for yourself!
  10. Help out at a shelter or food bank, or make a donation in honor of your loved one.
  11. Don’t overcommit. You don’t need to make the holiday meal, if you’re not up to it.
  12. It’s okay to be happy. It’s the holidays! Don’t feel guilty for enjoying yourself. It won’t diminish the love you have in your heart for your loved one.
  13. Read a book that will help identify your feelings and cope more easily with grief. I recommend these two: The Empty Chair: Handling Grief on Holidays and Special Occasions by Ed.D Zonnebelt-Smeenge, Susan J. R.N. and Robert C. De Vries | Sep 1, 2001. The Secret Life of Grief: A Memoir by Tanja Pajevic, 2016, 2016
  14. Get a massage.
  15. Use aromatherapy. Citrus oils are generally refreshing and uplifting for the mind and emotions, relieve stress and anxiety.  Consider: bergamot, grapefruit, lemon, and orange. Floral oils are often used as a personal fragrance and are useful to relieve anxiety, depression, and irritability. These oils are useful as an inhaler, in a body lotion, and for the bath. Consider: clary sage, geranium, lavender, rose, and ylang ylang.
  16. Get the sleep that you need.
  17. Make an appointment with a professional therapist if you need help.
  18. Eat a serving of high-quality protein with every meal and snack
  19. Focus on complex carbohydrates (whole grains, veggies and fruits), and eliminate junk foods (refined carbs).
  20. Enjoy unlimited amounts of fresh veggies.
  21. Eat a good breakfast!
  22. Eat 3 balanced meals and 1-2 snacks/day.
  23. Magnesium, B complex, fish-oil, walnuts, flax seeds, dark leafy greens, and high quality all help reduce stress and uplift mood.
  24. Meditate, light a candle, or find some quiet time for yourself.
  25. Take a multi-vitamin mineral supplement to support your overall health, well-being, and immunity.
  26. Exercise! At least take a short walk every day.
  27. Put on a CD, vinyl record or the radio and listen to your favorite music. Dancing as though no one is watching. There is nothing like music or dance to uplift the spirit.
  28. Put on a funny YouTube video and laugh.
  29. Meet a friend for a chat over coffee. Having a good chat and/or laugh, either via telephone or in person does wonders.
  30. Do the best you can. Try to relax and enjoy your family and friends.

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Barbra Cohn cared for her husband Morris for 10 years. He passed away from younger-onset Alzheimer’s disease in 2010. Afterward, she was compelled to write “Calmer Waters: The Caregiver’s Journey Through Alzheimer’s & Dementia”–winner of the 2018 Book Excellence Award in self-help– in order to help other caregivers feel healthier and happier, have more energy, sleep better, feel more confident, deal with feelings of guilt and grief, and to ultimately experience inner peace. “Calmer Waters” is available at AmazonBarnes & NobleBoulder Book StoreTattered Cover Book Store,  Indie Bound.org, and many other fine independent bookstores, as well as public libraries.

5 Things that Help Dementia that your Doctor Probably Hasn’t Mentioned

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Photo by Anastasia Dulgier

As a researcher and writer for manufacturers of nutrition supplements, I was in a unique position to care for my husband who was diagnosed with younger-onset Alzheimer’s disease right after his 60th birthday. Morris had opened and operated one of the first natural foods stores in Colorado in the late 1960s. After we married in 1974, I helped him run it. Working in a natural foods store was a natural fit for me because I had been a vegetarian for several years and was eager to learn more about natural health.

Later, I obtained a master’s degree in professional writing and my first job out of school was working as chief copy writer for a manufacturer of nutritional supplements. I learned a lot about supplements and ended up forming my own copy writing service. I learned how to interpret scientific studies, which especially came in handy when Morris was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease.

After the initial shock, I immediately went to work researching the drug protocol for Alzheimer’s. I discovered Namenda before it was FDA approved in the U.S. and ordered it from a European company. I gave Morris nutritional supplements, in addition to the prescribed pharmaceuticals, and butted heads with the neurologist who didn’t think that vitamins or minerals could possibly help someone with Alzheimer’s disease.

There have been some negative studies indicating that supplements don’t relieve symptoms of Alzheimer’s disease. But from what I can tell, they have been poorly designed and seem to be the fodder for sensational headlines. But there have also been many studies that show some dietary supplements can slow down dementia symptoms, and in some instances even reverse symptoms.

My purpose is not to convince you one way or the other. Rather, I encourage you as a caregiver to learn about dietary supplements and other modalities that have science backing them up.

  1. Souvenaid is a once-daily drink containing a mixture of long-chain omega-3 fatty acids, uridine, choline, B vitamins, vitamin C, vitamin E, and selenium) with some clinical evidence to suggest that it can benefit dearly Alzheimer’s patients. Doctors can prescribe it as a medical food in Australia and Europe, but it is not yet available in the United States. It is, however, available online. Read about the clinical evidence here: https://alzres.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s13195-019-0528-6

2. What about the use of cannabis for dementia? I live in Colorado where cannabis has been legal since 2014. Medical marijuana has been legal here since 2000. My husband smoked marijuana before it was in legal in Colorado to relieve his anxiety. He also ate “edibles.” It definitely calmed him down and made him happy, which may be the best outcome associated with cannabis. I did not notice any cognitive improvement.

This is the latest study on cannabis for dementia, published July 17, 2019.

 Limited evidence from one systematic review and one uncontrolled before-and-after study suggested that medical cannabis may be effective for treating agitation, disinhibition, irritability, aberrant motor behavior, and nocturnal behavior disorders as well as aberrant vocalization and resting care, which are neuropsychiatric symptoms associated with dementia.

There was also limited evidence of improvement in rigidity and cognitive scores as assessed by Mini-Mental State Examination. The evidence from the systematic review came from four of its primary studies, whereas its remaining eight included studies did not find favorable or unfavorable evidence regarding the effectiveness of cannabinoids in the treatment of dementia. Sources of uncertainty included the low quality of evidence in the primary studies of the systematic review and the fact that the uncontrolled before-and-after study was a nonrandomized pilot study in 10 dementia patients that reported descriptive outcomes without statistical analysis. No relevant evidence-based clinical guidelines regarding the use of medical cannabis for treating dementia were identified.

3. Vitamin D has been associated with memory loss and cognitive decline. Older adults with low vitamin D levels are at higher risk of dementia and may lose their cognitive abilities faster than those who have normal levels. This is one of the several reasons why everyone, except maybe those who work outdoors year-round, should take a vitamin D supplement.

4. Vitamin E includes several compounds: d-alpha tocopherol, high gamma tocopherol, mixed tocopherols and tocotrienols. Headlines have screamed that people who take more than 400 IUs of vitamin E have a 5 percent greater risk of death than those who don’t take the supplement. Unfortunately, the studies analyzed in this report used only alpha-tocopherol, a synthetic form of vitamin E. The studies were flawed in many other ways, but the important thing to understand is that when you take a full spectrum vitamin E, you are protecting your brain, your heart, and your overall health. A recent study looked at the relationship between tocotrienol and Alzheimer’s disease. Based on its ability to act as a free-radical scavenger, the authors concluded that it has the potential to help reduce risk of Alzheimer’s. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/29987193

5. I gave St. John’s wort to my husband until he was in late-stage Alzheimer’s disease. By then he needed a pharmaceutical anti-depressant. But the St. John’s wort worked well for mild to moderate depression.

Here’s what we know about St. John’s wort:

Pharmaceutical drugs usually come with a long list of possible side effects. Although some natural products can also have side effects, they are not as common and are usually less severe. One thing to note, though, about natural products is that it may take longer for them to be effective.

It’s always important to read and study when caring for a loved one. Become an informed caregiver. It will help you, your extended family and the person you so lovingly devote your time and energy to. Blessings to you.


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Barbra Cohn cared for her husband Morris for 10 years. He passed away from younger-onset Alzheimer’s disease in 2010. Afterward, she was compelled to write “Calmer Waters: The Caregiver’s Journey Through Alzheimer’s & Dementia”–winner of the 2018 Book Excellence Award in self-help– in order to help other caregivers feel healthier and happier, have more energy, sleep better, feel more confident, deal with feelings of guilt and grief, and to ultimately experience inner peace. “Calmer Waters” is available at AmazonBarnes & NobleBoulder Book StoreTattered Cover Book Store,  Indie Bound.org, and many other fine independent bookstores, as well as public libraries.

Mushrooms may reduce risk of mild cognitive impairment by 50%

Mushrooms - morchella mushrooms, boletus mushrooms, oyster mushrooms, on white background.If  you eat golden, oyster, shiitake and/or white button mushrooms, as well as dried and canned mushrooms, you’re in luck! A team from the Department of Psychological Medicine and Department of Biochemistry at the Yong Loo Lin School of Medicine at the National University of Singapore (NUS) has found that seniors who consume more than one and one-half cups of mushrooms weekly may reduce their odds of having mild cognitive impairment (MCI) by 50%. 

What is MCI?

Mild cognitive impairment causes cognitive changes that are serious enough to be noticed by people experiencing them or to other family and friends. The changes are not severe enough to interfere with daily activity. People with MCI that involves memory problems are more likely to develop Alzheimer’s disease or other dementias than people without MCI. Approximately 15-20 percent of people age 65 or older have MCI.

Mushrooms might be a key to reducing MCI

The correlation between eating mushrooms and reducing risk of MCI is surprising and encouraging, according to Assistant Professor Lei Feng, who is from the NUS Department of Psychological Medicine, and the lead author of this work.

The six-year study, which was conducted from 2011 to 2017, collected data from more than 600 Chinese seniors over the age of 60 living in Singapore. The research was carried out with support from the Life Sciences Institute and the Mind Science Centre at NUS, as well as the Singapore Ministry of Health’s National Medical Research Council. The results were published online in the Journal of Alzheimer’s Disease on 12 March 2019.

The researchers found that the compound called ergothioneine (ET), a unique antioxidant and anti-inflammatory which humans are unable to synthesize on their own, is the key to possibly reducing MCI. Ergothioneine is found in liver, kidney, black beans, kidney bean and oat bran. But the highest levels are found in bolete and oyster mushrooms.

Other compounds contained within mushrooms may also be advantageous for decreasing the risk of cognitive decline. Certain hericenones, erinacines, scabronines and dictyophorines may promote the synthesis of nerve growth factors. Bioactive compounds in mushrooms may also protect the brain from neurodegeneration by inhibiting production of beta amyloid and phosphorylated tau, and acetylcholinesterase, the culprits of Alzheimer’s disease.

How much do you need to eat?

In the study, a portion was defined as three quarters of a cup of cooked mushrooms with an average weight of around 150 grams. Two portions would be equivalent to approximately half a plate. While the portion sizes act as a guideline, it was shown that even one small portion of mushrooms a week may still be beneficial to reduce chances of MCI.

An article in Science Daily said this: According to Robert Beelman, professor emeritus of food science and director of the Penn State Center for Plant and Mushroom Products for Health, it’s preliminary, but you can see that countries that have more ergothioneine in their diets, countries like France and Italy, also have lower incidents of neurodegenerative diseases, while people in countries like the United States, which has low amounts of ergothioneine in the diet, have a higher probability of diseases like Parkinson’s Disease and Alzheimer’s,” said Beelman. “Now, whether that’s just a correlation or causative, we don’t know. But, it’s something to look into, especially because the difference between the countries with low rates of neurodegenerative diseases is about 3 milligrams per day, which is about five button mushrooms each day.”

 

Mushroom recipes

Cooking mushrooms does not seem to significantly affect the compounds. Roasted or baked mushrooms are simple to make and delicious, and go well with most foods as a side dish or topping.

Wash and slice musthrooms. Lightly oil shallow baking pan large enough to hold mushrooms in single layer. Add mushrooms and toss with 2 to 3 tablespoons oil. Add garlic; season with salt; roastfor 20 minutes stirring on occasion; mushrooms should be browned. Season with pepper.

For baked mushrooms with parmesan, thyme and lemon simply toss with olive oil, Paremesan cheese, garlic, thyme, lemon zest and lemon juice.

For more mushroom recipes google for mushroom risotto, mushroom gravy, cream of mushroom soup, creamy mushroom pasta, mushroom and barley soup.


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Barbra Cohn cared for her husband Morris for 10 years. He passed away from younger-onset Alzheimer’s disease in 2010. Afterward, she was compelled to write “Calmer Waters: The Caregiver’s Journey Through Alzheimer’s & Dementia”–winner of the 2018 Book Excellence Award in self-help– in order to help other caregivers feel healthier and happier, have more energy, sleep better, feel more confident, deal with feelings of guilt and grief, and to ultimately experience inner peace. “Calmer Waters” is available at AmazonBarnes & NobleBoulder Book StoreTattered Cover Book Store,  Indie Bound.org, and many other fine independent bookstores, as well as public libraries.

What happens to your body when you’re a stressed caregiver?

Woman having a headacheStatistics show the stress of care giving can result in chronic disease for the caregiver and take as many as 10 years off one’s life. In comparison to caregivers of people in all categories, caregivers of Alzheimer’s patients in particular rate their health more poorly, take worse care of themselves, and spend more money on their health care. Feeling more tired and depleted, they evaluate themselves as less healthy, engage in fewer health-promoting behaviors, and use more health services.

Given the demands on caregivers’ time and energy, they may neglect their own self-care by sleeping less, eating too much or too little, not exercising, or not managing their own health problems. Neglect of their own health may worsen pre-existing illnesses or increase vulnerabilities to new stress-related problems.

The Physiology of Stress

Walter Cannon described the fight or flight response in 1929.  Adrenaline is the fight-or-flight hormone: It causes cells, especially muscle cells, to speed up energy production so that the body will be ready to fight a foe or run away. It is needed for short blasts of stress.

  • Pupils dilate to sharpen vision.
  • Heart rate and blood pressure increase to accelerate the delivery of oxygen to fuel the muscles and critical organs.
  • Blood flow is diverted from non-critical areas such as the gastrointestinal tract to the critical areas such as the heart, skeletal muscles and liver.
  • Liver releases glucose and fatty acids into the bloodstream. Glucose is for immediate energy; fat is needed when the fight-or-flight response lasts longer than expected.
  • Bronchial tubes dilate to maximize the exchange of oxygen and carbon dioxide.

Cortisol bolsters us in long-lasting stress situations. But when the body is dealing with chronic stress, the adrenals get “stuck” in the on position and the whole system goes into chronic “fight or flight.”

  • Glucose that is dumped into your bloodstream goes unused, so your body has to produce an enormous amount of insulin to handle it. Eventually, this may result in hypoglycemia or diabetes.
  • Fat that is dumped into your blood also goes unused, so it clogs your arteries, leading to cardiovascular disease.
  • If you drink caffeine, the stress hormone cortisol becomes elevated, which can set you up for countless health problems including: poor quality of sleep, impaired immunity and age-related deterioration.

Adrenal exhaustion–The adrenal glands produce or contribute to the production of about 150 hormones. When they are stressed, they become exhausted. Once the adrenal buffer is gone, you become a prime candidate for asthma, allergy, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, autoimmune disorders, hypoglycemia

Alcohol, caffeine, sugar and salt put added stress on the adrenals.

Stimulate, such as caffeine increase the effects of your body’s own stimulating neurotransmitters: norepinephrine and dopamine, which are similar to adrenaline in their effects. Caffeine and these natural stimulants provide short-term energy, focus and even a lifted mood. But in the long-term, caffeine depletes your stores of norepinephrine and dopamine, leaving you more tired, sluggish and down than you were before the caffeine habit.

Psychological stress can impact cardiovascular function and lead to cardiovascular disease, and possible stroke/heart attack.

Stress and sleep

Adequate sleep repairs your body, sharpens your mind and stabilizes emotions. Lack of sleep triggers the body to increase production of cortisol, which makes it harder to fall asleep and stay in a deep sleep because on some level your body and brain think they need to stay alert for danger.

  • Loss of sleep as a result of caring for a loved one can lead to serious depression.
  • As little as five nights of poor sleep can significantly stress the heart.

Weight gain and insulin resistance

  • Increased cortisol production leads to weight gain. The adrenals increase gluconeogenesis, which provides the body with glucose from protein, rather than carbohydrates. This decreases serotonin and melatonin, which results in poor sleep and leads to food cravings for carbohydrate-rich foods in order to uplift mood, which releases more serotonin and insulin. This leads to more stress and insulin production to regulate glucose, which may lead to fat storage, weight gain and insulin resistance. It becomes a vicious cycle.
  • Insufficient sleep is also associated with lower levels of leptin, a hormone that alerts the brain that it has enough food, as well as higher levels of ghrelin, a biochemical that stimulates appetite. Consequently, poor sleep may result in food cravings.

Exercise

  1. Insufficient sleep may leave us too tired to burn off extra calories with exercise.
  2. When your body is stressed and prepared to fight or run it’s full of stress hormones. If you’re sedentary, those hormones will continue to circulate and cause damage to your body. Vigorous exercise, however, burns off those hormones. Exercise also releases the neurotransmitter serotonin and endorphins, the body’s natural pain relievers.
  3. Doctors from Nottingham Trent University suggest the chemical phenylethylamine is released during exercise and could play a part in uplifting mood as a result of exercise. Phenylethylamine is a naturally produced chemical that has been linked to the regulation of physical energy, mood and attention.

Impact of food on mood and physiology

Hazards of caffeine

  1. Caffeine stresses the adrenal glands and can contribute to anxiety, insomnia, depression, irritability, anxiousness—not good for caregivers. In fact, studies show that those who drink the most coffee often suffer from chronic depression. It depletes the body of B1, biotin, inositol, vitamin C, calcium, potassium, and zinc. It increases thirst because it is dehydrating, over stimulates and weakens the kidneys, pancreas, liver, stomach, intestines, heart, and nervous system.
  2. Can increase production of cortisol, leading to stronger cravings for fat and carbohydrates. This increases blood glucose, release of insulin and fat stored in the abdomen.
  3. Increases dopamine levels, making you feel good until it wears off
  4. May interfere with restful sleep
  5. Try not to drink coffee after 2pm
  6. Simple carbohydrates increase insulin production.

People who are stressed often crave and overeat sugar and simple carbohydrates, like chips, cookies and white bread or pasta, because those foods provide a fast release of the feel-good chemical serotonin. But eating this way causes a blood-sugar crash a couple of hours later, leaving you tired and moody. The more of these foods that you eat the more you crave. Although these foods are high in calories, they contribute few nutrients and deplete the body of essential vitamins and minerals, raise triglycerides, and contribute to inflammation and excess weight.

  1. Lack of water/fiber can rob the body of nutrients because of problems with digestion and assimilation
  • HFCS and other artificial sweeteners can interfere with your natural production of neurotransmitters. Aspartame (NutraSweet and Equal) competes with tryptophan by blocking its conversion into serotonin. Artificial sweeteners contribute to numerous adverse symptoms, as compiled by the Food and Drug Administration and include everything from menstrual changes, weight gain, and headaches to severe depression, insomnia and anxiety attacks.

High fructose corn syrup (glucose and fructose) can lead to a decrease in leptin production leading your body into thinking it’s hungry so you eat more, especially processed foods. HFCS can lead to insulin resistance and higher levels of triglycerides, as well as obesity, hypertension and cardiovascular disease.

Bad habits, i.e. forgetting to eat, eating on the run, not eating breakfast all contribute to unstable blood sugar and adrenal exhaustion, which makes you grab foods that aren’t good for you, so you end up feeling irritable, moody, and even more stressed.


You get the picture? It’s important to take care of yourself, especially when you are taking care of someone else. I don’t want to overwhelm you with information or preach to you. Here’s a short checklist to help you stay healthy and balanced.

  • Eat a serving of high-quality protein with every meal and snack
  • Focus on complex carbohydrates (whole grains, veggies and fruits), and eliminate junk foods (refined carbs).
  • Enjoy unlimited amounts of fresh veggies.
  • Eat a good breakfast!
  • Eat 3 balanced meals and 1-2 snacks/day.
  • Magnesium, B complex, fish-oil, walnuts, flax seeds, dark leafy greens, and high quality all help reduce stress and uplift mood.
  • Meditate or find some quiet time for yourself
  • Exercise! At least take a short walk everyday.
  • Put on a funny YouTube video and laugh.
  • Use aromatherapy.
  • Do the best you can.

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Barbra Cohn cared for her husband Morris for 10 years. He passed away from younger-onset Alzheimer’s disease in 2010. Afterward, she was compelled to write “Calmer Waters: The Caregiver’s Journey Through Alzheimer’s & Dementia”–winner of the 2018 Book Excellence Award in self-help– in order to help other caregivers feel healthier and happier, have more energy, sleep better, feel more confident, deal with feelings of guilt and grief, and to ultimately experience inner peace. “Calmer Waters” is available at AmazonBarnes & NobleBoulder Book StoreTattered Cover Book Store,  Indie Bound.org, and many other fine independent bookstores, as well as public libraries.

Calmer Waters: Spring 2019 book signings and events

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Especially for folks in the Denver-metro area: You are warmly invited! Please drop by at a book signing to say hello, or attend the caregiver symposium or conference (or both!) for lots of great information, networking and support. Respite care is available for both events. Click on the links to find out more.

7 healing soups to help you get through the cold and flu season

fresh soup 1January is National Soup month, and it’s also the month when people get colds and flues. It’s especially important during these cold winter months to support your immune system, get plenty of sleep, and try to maintain an uplifted mood.

Winter soups can warm us, strengthen us, help heal us and protect us from getting sick.  Home-made soup contains fresh ingredients that have more antioxidants, vitamins, minerals, and protein. Canned soups are typically overcooked, high in sodium, and can have additives and preservatives. A big pot of soup will last several days, saving time in the kitchen. It is also an easy-to-eat, easy-to-digest form of nutrition for patients with a chronic illness such as Alzheimer’s, and for those bed-ridden with the flu.

If you’re lucky, your grandmother or mother gave you their delicious soup recipes. Here are some of my favorites for nourishing the body and soul during the cold winter months.

Immune boosting soups

Tomato Vegetable Soup

  • 2 cans whole tomatoes (organic, chopped)
  • 2 onions (sautéed)
  • 6 cloves garlic (pressed and sautéd)
  • 1⁄2 tsp oregano (dried)
  • 1 medium winter squash (peeled and cut into chunks)
  • 1 medium rutabaga (chopped)
  • 1 bunch turnips (chopped greens and roots)
  • 1 pound zucchini (cut into chunks)

Add water to cover and simmer until done. Serve with brown rice or couscous. 

Minestrone

  • 4 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil, divided
  • 1 medium yellow onion, chopped
  • 2 medium carrots, peeled and chopped
  • 2 medium ribs celery, chopped
  • 2 cups chopped seasonal vegetables (potatoes, yellow squash, zucchini, butternut squash, green beans or peas; whatever you have)
  • 2 cloves garlic, pressed or minced
  • ½ teaspoon dried oregano
  • ½ teaspoon dried thyme
  • 1 large can (28 ounces) diced tomatoes, with their liquid (or 2 small 15-ounce cans)
  • 4 cups (32 ounces) vegetable broth
  • 2 cups water
  • 1 teaspoon fine sea salt
  • 1 bay leaf
  • Pinch of red pepper flakes
  • Freshly ground black pepper
  • 1 cup whole grain orecchiette, elbow or small shell pasta
  • 1 can (15 ounces) Great Northern beans, cannellini beans, or kidney beans rinsed and drained, or 1 ½ cups cooked beans
  • 2 cups baby spinach or 2 cups chopped and carefully washed spinach.
  • Freshly grated Parmesan cheese, for garnishing (optional)

 Heat the oil in a large pot and add the onion, carrots and celery. When the onion is translucent add the chopped seasonal vegetables, garlic, oregano and thyme and cook for about 2 minutes. Next, add the broth, water, salt, bay leaf, pepper flakes, and pepper. Bring to a boil and then lower to simmer and cook for about 15 minutes. Add the beans, cook for an additional 10 minutes. Add the spinach and cook until wilted. Ladle cooked pasta into each bowl and add the soup on top. Do not cook the pasta in the soup because it will eventually turn to mush. Garnish with Parmesan cheese.

Miso Stew

  • 5 cups water
  • 1/2 cup dried quinoa, rinsed
  • 1 onion chopped
  • 4 cloves garlic
  • 1 tsp-sized chunk minced ginger
  • 2 stalks chopped celery
  • 2 carrots chopped
  • 1 cup chopped kale
  • 1/4 cup torn pieces combo/arame/nori seaweed (your choice)
  • 2 eggs (optional)
  • 1/4 cup organic red or white miso
  • 3 tsp toasted sesame oil
  • 1/2 tsp turmeric
  • 1/4 tsp cayenne

Saute onion until soft in 2 tsp of the sesame oil. Add garlic and cook for a few minutes. Bring water, quinoa and carrots to a boil.  Reduce  to medium and add onion, garlic, ginger, celery and seaweed (if it’s a firm variety). Cook for five minutes. Crack eggs into pot and stir gently. When egg is mostly cooked, remove from heat and add kale and any tender seaweed. In a separate bowl mix miso, the remaining sesame oil, turmeric and cayenne. Add a large spoonful of broth (not boiling) and stir until smooth. When pot of soup has cooled enough to touch, add in miso mixture and serve hot. This soup can be reheated but do not boil the miso because this will kill the beneficial enzymes.

Chicken soup (Jewish penicillin)

  • 1 large whole chicken
  • 4 carrots chopped
  • 3 stalks celery chopped
  • 2 medium parsnips chopped
  • 2 medium rutabagas
  • 1 large onion chopped
  • small bunch of fresh dill
  • 2 Tbs salt, or salt to taste

Wash the chicken inside and out, remove any feathers and place in a large pot. Cover the chicken with water. Bring the liquid to a boil, lower the heat, and for the next several minutes, remove any scum that rises to the surface. Add the vegetables and salt.

Cover the pan partially and simmer the soup for 2-1/2 hours or until the chicken meat is very soft when pierced with the tip of a sharp knife. Pour the soup through a strainer or colander into a large bowl or a second pot. Set the chicken and vegetables aside. Remove the fat from the surface of the liquid with a spoon or fat-skimming tool.

For best results, refrigerate the strained soup; when it is cold, the fat will rise to the surface and harden and you can scoop it off. (Refrigerate the vegetables and the chicken separately.) Serve the soup plain or with the vegetables and boned, cut-up chicken.

Ward off the negative effects of stress

Mineral Broth

This broth helps to alkalize the body and warm the system. It also helps counter the negative effects of stress. Have it as a bowl of soup, or sip it throughout the day.

Wash with a scrub brush and cut into 1-inch chunks:

  • 1 medium potato (any variety, raw with skin)
  • 1 cup zucchini
  • 1 cup cabbage
  • 1 cup green beans
  • 2 cups celery cut into strips:
  • 1 cup kale or collard greens
  • 1 cup onion 

Coarsely chop:

  • a small bunch of dill weed
  • 1 clove garlic

Place ingredients in a large pot with a lid. Cover with  water, just to the level of the vegetables and add:

  • 6 slices fresh ginger root
  • 1/4 cup or more seaweed (dulse, nori, wakame, hiziki, kombu)
  • Seasonal greens (kale, mustard, spinach, broccoli)

Bring the water to a boil, then turn down to a simmer, and cover for three to ve hours. Strain the broth with a colander. Let cool before refrigerating or freezing. Will keep in fridge for five to seven days or in the freezer for four months.

Variations:

  • Add cubed sweet potato to soup mix in the beginning of cooking time.
  • Add 1⁄2 tsp. curry 10 minutes before serving for a zesty flavor.

Alleviate joint and inflammation

Bone broth

  • 6 pounds of any kind of bones (beef, chicken, etc.)
  • 3 cups of your favorite vegetables, chopped (carrots, celery, onion, potatoes, etc.)
  • 1 bunch flat parsley
  • 1 bunch fresh thyme
  • 1 head garlic, halved crosswise
  • 2 Bay leaves
  • 1 Tbs vinegar*
  • pepper and salt to taste

Rinse the bones in a large pot with cold water. Drain the water and place the bones back in the pot. Cover with at least 4 inches of cold water and cook over medium-high heat for about 45 minutes until the liquid boils. Reduce heat to medium.

Simmer until broth looks clear, about 1 hour. Skim the fat off occasionally using a ladle. Add the rest of the ingredients and simmer for 2 hours. Skim off fat and discard bits of meat. Then pour the broth through a fine-mesh strainer. Discard the solids. Cool before storing. This broth can be sipped throughout the day. It will keep in the refrigerator for 3 days. It can also be frozen in BPA-free bags, glass jars and BPA-free plastic containers.

* You must add some vinegar to the pot of soup in order to force the calcium in the bones to dissolve from the bones into the soup juice. Just 1 pint of soup can give you as much as 1,000 milligrams of calcium.

Ayurvedic healing soup

This traditional soup is wonderful during times of stress, stomach upset, and any time the appetite is diminished due to sickness or stress.

Kicheree

  • 4 Tbs organic Basmati rice
  • 4 Tbs mung dal or red lentils
  • 4 1/2 cups water (more or less, depending on whether you like it soupy or thick)
  • 2 tsp grated fresh ginger
  • 2 Tbs fresh lemon juice
  • 1 cup assorted veggies cut bite-sized (zucchini, yam, carrot, cauliflower, broccoli, etc.)
  • 1 tsp ground coriander seed
  • 1 tsp ground cumin seed
  • 1/4 tsp turmeric
  • salt and pepper to taste

Combine the rice, dal ginger, veggies and water in pot. Add the spices. Bring to a boil over medium heat; then lower to a simmer for 45-50 minutes. Add water if it gets too thick. Remove from the stove. Add the lemon juice, salt and pepper.

Enjoy!


For more great information about how you can reduce stress, feel happier, more energetic, healthier, deal with issues of grief and depression, and ultimately experience inner peace, read Calmer Waters: The Caregiver’s Journey Through Alzheimer’s and Dementia.   Available on Amazon and at all bookstores that sell quality books.

BarbraCohn__

10 New year requirements for all caregivers

You’re tired, you’re stressed–You and 45 million or so American caregivers. So what are you going to do about it? Don’t say that “I don’t have time to take care of myself.” I’ve been there and done that. But I always promised myself that I was not going to be a martyr and sacrifice my health for my husband’s illness. Because if both of us went done that wasn’t going to serve any purpose, least of all our children. They were barely adults when my husband was in the throes of Alzheimer’s disease. They needed at least one healthy parent. And whether you are taking care of a spouse, parent or child, there are other people in your life who love and need you, not necessarily to take care of them, but to love and support them emotionally.

When you are a caregiver, it’s hard to find the time to go to the gym or even take a shower, somedays. But it’s absolutely vital that you take care of yourself or you will end up getting sick and then who will take care of your loved one? Who will take care of YOU?

Here are 10 easy ways to take the edge off your stress and fatigue so you feel some relief.

  • Say a positive affirmation before you get out of bed. “This day is going to be a good one.” “I am grateful for my friends and family.” “I am healthy and full of energy.” “I am strong and competent.” Say something positive to set the tone of the day.
  • Before you reach for a cup of coffee, drink a glass of hot water with lemon. It hydrates your body and brain, the lemon helps to alkalize the system (yes, it’s counter intuitive), which is usually too acidic, and it helps with regularity.
  • Ask for help! You don’t have to do it all by yourself. No one is going to think badly of you if you take some time for yourself. If your loved one resents your going out, it’s okay. Don’t become a slave to their wishes and rants. If you can’t leave your loved one alone, please ask a neighbor, friend or home care professional to help at least a couple hours a week. Some social service programs provide free respite care.
  • Many cities throughout the U.S. offer volunteer snowbusters (volunteers who will shovel your walk and driveway), fix-it volunteers who will help with easy home repairs, and yard maintenance volunteers.
  • Meet a friend for a chat over coffee. Having a good chat and/or laugh, either via telephone or in person does wonders.
  • Find a walking partner in your neighborhood and try to walk at least once a week (preferably 3 times a week).
  • Put on a CD, vinyl record or the radio and listen to your favorite music. If your care partner is mobile, ask him/her to dance. There is nothing like music or dance to uplift the spirit.
  • Use essential oils to immediately diffuse feelings of sadness, depression, anxiety, etc. Lavender oil is the most frequently used fragrance. You can also try bergamot, grapefruit, lemon, orange, clary sage, geranium, rose, and ylang ylang, frankincense, and myrrh. Put the oil in a diffuser or spray bottle to mist your collar or pillow. Find a fragrance that is pleasing to your care partner. It’ll help him/her also.
  • Take a multi-vitamin mineral supplement to support your overall health, well-being, and immunity.
  • It’s important to get at least 6 hours (preferably 7 or 8) of sleep every night. Of course, this isn’t always possible if you are caring for someone and need to get up at night, or are worried about paying the bills, taking care of the car, getting a new stove, etc. If you can’t get in the hours at night, put your feet up for 10 minutes during the day when your care partner naps. Or take a power nap. It really helps.

Wishing you and your loved ones a healthy, happy New Year! And remember that “this too shall pass.”

Barbra Cohn cared for her husband Morris for 10 years. He passed away from younger-onset Alzheimer’s disease in 2010. Afterward, she was compelled to write “Calmer Waters: The Caregiver’s Journey Through Alzheimer’s & Dementia”—Winner of the 2018 Book Excellence Award in Self-Help—in order to help other caregivers feel healthier and happier, have more energy, sleep better, feel more confident, deal with feelings of guilt and grief, and to ultimately experience inner peace. “Calmer Waters” is available at AmazonBarnes & NobleBoulder Book StoreTattered Cover Book Store,  Indie Bound.org, and many other fine independent bookstores, as well as public libraries.

20 energy and stress fixes to use now!

The holidays are stressful for everyone, but especially for caregivers. Here’s a list of some of my favorite stress relievers and energy boosters.

Soak in an Epsom salt bath and put in a few drops of lavender oil.
Soak in an Epsom salt bath and sprinkle in a few drops of lavender oil.
  1. Start the day with an affirmation. Before you get out of bed say something such as: “I am happy for the beautiful day.” I am grateful for my family and friends.” “I am cherished.” Make it yours, make it sincere. It’s amazing how it can set a positive tone of the day.
  2. Breathe! When we are stressed we tend to hold our breath. Take a 5-minute break and sit down in a comfortable chair. Close your eyes and take a deep breath, in and out. Then focus on your breath and watch how your mind quiets down and your muscles relax. Then remember to breathe throughout the day. Whenever you feel yourself getting anxious or tight, take a deep breath and let it go.
  3. Drink water. We’ve heard it a million times but it’s always good to be reminded. Forget about sodas and limit the wine and alcohol. Staying hydrated, especially at this time of year, is vital to supporting the immune system and reducing inflammation. It’s also important to support healthy cognitive function and memory.
  4. Make lists, including a meal plan for the week. It helps eliminate the last hour panic of “what am I going to make for dinner?” and unhealthy last-minute food decisions like ordering pizza.
  5. “Me time” is important! Get respite care if your loved one needs full-time attention. Ask a neighbor, relative or friend to come over for an hour or two so you can take a walk, go to the gym, or meet a friend for lunch or coffee.
  6. Eat walnuts. A daily dose of about 9 whole walnuts or 1 Tbs. walnut oil helps your blood pressure from spiking during stress. Walnuts contain L-arginine, an amino acid that helps relax blood vessels, which in turn helps reduce hypertension.
  7. Drink green tea. L-Theanine is the main chemical constituent in green tea. It is an ideal nutritional aid for stress because it produces alpha-wave activity that leads to deep relaxation and mental alertness. This is especially important because in order to mitigate stressful situations, it’s important to remain calm and alert. Theanine also stimulates the release of the neurotransmitters GABA, serotonin and dopamine, which help us feel happy, motivated and calm. Green tea extract is available as a nutritional supplement, which might be easier and quicker to take, and it’ll save you a lot of trips to the bathroom.
  8. While we’re on the topic of “green,” be sure to eat green leafy vegetables for vitamin B and magnesium, both of which help your body cope with stress.
  9. Two handfuls of cashews (make that a small handful, please; one ounce of cashews contains 157 calories.) provide a mood-boosting effect because they are one of the highest natural sources of tryptophan, the precursor for serotonin, the feel-good neurotransmitter.
  10. Did someone mention dark chocolate? It reduces cortisol, the stress hormone that causes anxiety symptoms. Just a couple of pieces should do the trick.
  11. Stretch! It’s important for everyone, not just runners and athletes. Stretching keeps your muscles flexible, strong and healthy. Without it, muscles tighten and weaken, which puts you at risk for joint pain and strain.
  12. Walk around the block. Just getting out into fresh air will instantly relieve stress, and moving your body gets your blood pumping and will clear your mind.
  13. Light candles and play relaxing music while you eat. It will change the mood instantly.
  14. Aromatherapy is a miracle cure for stress and anxiety. Use a wall plug-in to diffuse the aroma of lavender oil to uplift mood, or place a few drops on a handkerchief and tuck it into a shirt pocket or on a pillow. Other oils to try: vetiver, frankincense, myrrh, orange, lemon, bergamot, and grapefruit.
  15. Sit down, close the door and meditate. If you don’t have a mantra use the word OM. Repeat it silently and when you realize you are not saying it, then gently come back to it. Do it for 10 to 20 minutes every day and yoyu will notice that you are much more relaxed.
  16. Music is the universal language, and it is also the universal stress reliever. Whether it’s jazz, classical, or hard rock that makes you feel better, by all means, play it loud, play it soft, dance to it, drive to it, go to sleep to it. It will definitely help.
  17. Take a multi-vitamin mineral supplement to help with stress, energy and immune support.
  18. Warm up with warming herbs and spices such as ginger, turmeric, cumin, oregano, cayenne, black pepper, cardamon, garlic.
  19. Take an Epsom salt bath and put in a few drops of lavender oil. Light some candles, turn down the lights, put on some music, and relax!
  20. Getting the proper rest is vital to staying healthy and reducing stress. Prepare yourself for a deep night’s sleep by unplugging from electronics at least an hour before bed, taking an Epsom salt bath (put several drops of lavender oil in the water for added relaxation), and making sure the room temperature isn’t too warm.  Good night, sleep tight!

If you, or someone you care about, tend to suffer from stress, anxiety, or depression, these recommendations might just “take the edge off” and improve your quality of life … without the risk of side effects. May the holiday season begin!

Best wishes for a happy, safe and relatively stress-free holiday season!

Barbra Cohn cared for her husband Morris for 10 years. He passed away from younger-onset Alzheimer’s disease in 2010. Afterward, she was compelled to write “Calmer Waters: The Caregiver’s Journey Through Alzheimer’s & Dementia”—Winner of the 2018 Book Excellence Award in Self-Help—in order to help other caregivers feel healthier and happier, have more energy, sleep better, feel more confident, deal with feelings of guilt and grief, and to ultimately experience inner peace. “Calmer Waters” is available at AmazonBarnes & NobleBoulder Book StoreTattered Cover Book Store,  Indie Bound.org, and many other fine independent bookstores, as well as public libraries.

The best gifts for people with Alzheimer’s and dementia

Christmas gift or New Year with blue ribbon and greeting card on wood table on bokeh background. Tiny and Handmade gift box concept.Instead of worrying about what to give a friend or loved one who suffers from Alzheimer’s disease or dementia consider this. What that person really wants more than anything is to just be with you. So here’s a list of things you can do together.

  1. People with dementia love ice cream. Share a pint of his or her favorite. Bring the toppings and arrange them on a table in little bowls—sprinkles, chocolate chips, chopped fruit, whipped cream, butterscotch or chocolate sauce, etc.
  2. Watch a comedy together. It doesn’t matter if your loved one can follow the plot or not. If you laugh, he or she will probably join in the merriment. Laughter triggers the production of endorphins; the brain chemicals that reduce the sensation of pain and make you feel good.
  3. Bring a dog to visit your loved one. If you don’t have one, borrow one. There’s nothing like a friendly pup to cheer someone up and add some excitement. Listen to music together.
  4. Put on a CD and sing together. Big Band Music is usually a hit with most 70, 80 and 90 year olds. If your loved one is younger, you can try classic rock.
  5. Get out the paint brush, paper and water colors. You don’t have to be an artist or art teacher to have fun with your loved one. Painting and drawing is a great way to share time together, and to even express feelings of frustration, irritation and fear—on paper.
  6. Dance to the music. If your loved one is still mobile help him or her get up and move. The exercise will enhance memories, even if temporarily. A short surge of condensed exercise boosts the compression of memories in both elders in good mental shape as well as those with slight cognitive impairment, according to new research by a team of scientists from UC Irvine’s Center for the Neurobiology of Learning & Memory.http://www.cnlm.uci.edu/
  7. Go for a drive and get some fresh air. Just getting out of the house or memory care home does a body good.
  8. Hold hands, give a foot massage. Use aromatherapy oils (see chapter 18 “Aromatherapy” in The Caregiver’s Journey Through Alzheimer’s and Dementia
  9. Create a book of photos that depict your loved one’s life and share memories without saying “remember when. . .”
  10. Just breathe together and be still in the silence. It’s the greatest gift of all.

Treat yourself to the perfect gift for all caregivers to help you feel healthier and happier, less stressed, sleep better, deal with feelings of guilt and grief and find inner peace. The Caregiver’s Journey Through Alzheimer’s and Dementia

BarbraCohn__

15 self-care strategies to reduce holiday stress

Hand writing text caption inspiration showing Self Care. Business concept for Taking caring for own Health Written on sticky note paper, wooden background with folded pink paper meaning thinkingIt’s National Family Caregivers Month and the perfect time to consider how you can reduce the stress of the holidays by taking better care of yourself.

  1. First, pat yourself on the back. If you are a caregiver you’re doing an incredible service of giving of yourself and your time. Whether your care recipient verbally expresses appreciation or not, know that you are a bright light in that person’s life and in the world.
  2. Before getting out of bed in the morning repeat an affirmation several times to set the tone of the day. Some ideas: “Today is going to be a good day,” “I am a loving, kind person,” “I am grateful for my family and friends.”
  3. It’s especially important to eat well at this time of year when colds and flues are rampant and the stress of the holidays taxes the immune system. Focus on warming foods such as soups and stews, mineral and bone broths, and ginger tea. Citrus fruits are in season and offer vitamin C, important for immune support. The winter squashes offer beta carotene and vitamin A, which are also excellent antioxidants. Please listen to my interview with Mary Collete Rogers on her podcast “The Healthy Kitchen Companion” for ideas about how to include healthy foods into your diet and how to organize your kitchen. Caring for yourself and others with good nutrition.
  4. Make a food plan for the week and bring a shopping list with you so you don’t have to make a repeat run to the grocery store.
  5. Calm yourself with calming foods. Studies show an association between the levels of the neurotransmitter serotonin and mood. The good news is you can naturally increase your serotonin levels with food such as these: sweet potatoes, brown rice, oatmeal, amaranth, buckwheat, millet and quinoa allow your brain to process more serotonin. Eating protein and healthy omega-3 fats, found in fish, walnuts and flax, will also improve mood. B vitamins, which are abundant in fresh leafy greens and in chemical-free, pasture-raised meat, are another important factor because they’re needed for serotonin production. Leafy greens, such as spinach, kale, collard greens, are high in folic acid, a B vitamin. Low levels are linked to depression. Bananas contain vitamin B6. They are high in potassium, an important electrolyte for a happy and calm mind.
  6. Reduce stress by supporting your adrenal glands with supportive supplements. The adrenal glands sit on top of your kidneys and produce adrenaline and cortisol, the stress hormones. If you press on your kidneys and they hurt, there’s a good chance your adrenals are working overtime due to stress. Stress may hit us as a headache, backache, insomnia, anxiety, irritability, respiratory, illness, or the flu.  If we really become overwhelmed, stress may accumulate to the point where our entire immune system is compromised and we end up fighting a serious illness. The good news is that adaptogens and nervines —two categories of herbs—can help your body adapt to stress, creating a state of homeostasis.

Recommended adaptogens:

  • Ashwagandha – is an Ayurvedic herb that has also been called “Indian ginseng.” It raises energy levels, enhances immunity, helps the body cope with stress, and reduces the stress hormone cortisol.
  • Cordyceps – is a revered Chinese nourishing tonic used to build strength and stamina, support the immune system, combat fatigue and the effects of aging, and invigorate the elderly and those weakened after serious illness.
  • Gotu kola – is an important brain and nervous system restorative in Ayurvedic medicine. It is also used as a mild diuretic and for insomnia and gastric complaints.
  • Rhodiola – also called golden root, stimulates and protects the immune system by supporting the adrenal hormones. It boosts immunity, improves concentration and stress resistance, and increases physical performance and uplifts mood.  It is also a remedy for sleep difficulties, poor appetite, irritability, hypertension, headaches, and fatigue from intense physical or intellectual strain.

Nervines

According to David Hoffmann, a leading herbalist and spokesperson for a return to herbal medicines, a nervine is a plant remedy that has a beneficial effect upon the nervous system in some way.  Nervines are especially useful during times of stress because they have a strong relaxing and calming effect without producing a dulling, “hang-over” side effect.  They also tone and restore the nervous system to a more balanced state.  Some nervines are also anti-spasmodic, meaning they relax the peripheral nerves and the muscle tissue, which in turn has a relaxing effect on the whole system.

Recommended nervines:

  • Passion flower- is beneficial for anxiety, insomnia, tension headaches, muscle aches and spasms, pain, hyperactivity, epilepsy, and to alleviate anger and help lower blood pressure.
  • Skullcap – is antispasmodic and relaxing and is recommended to relieve headaches, mood swings, insomnia, premenstrual syndrome, and nervous tension and exhaustion

The next time you’re feeling nervous, agitated, restless or hyped up, calm your nerves with a nervine herb. If you want to rejuvenate your adrenal glands and boost your entire immune system, take an adaptogen.  You’ll have more energy, feel happier and less stressed, and your overall health will improve too!

7. Move! Exercise is vital to staying healthy and strong. The days you feel “stuck” or stiff are the days it’s most important to put on your walking shoes, sunglasses, and a hat, and go for a walk. Chat with/walk with a friend or with your pet dog

8. Take a bath. Hydrotherapy has been used for thousands of years as a healing modality throughout the world to relieve stress, release aches and stiffness, and refresh the mind and emotions. For an added benefit, add Epsom salts and/or essential oil.

9. Dance is an amazing healing aid that can instantly enhance your mood and create joy. Put on your favorite Motown, R & B or salsa music and dance in your living room as though no one is watching. A twenty-one-year long Einstein Aging Study, completed in 2001, found that dancing is the best physical activity to help prevent dementia when compared to eleven other activities including team sports, swimming, and bicycling. The study was summarized in an article that appeared in the New England Journal of Medicine in 2003.

10.Breathe deeply. Most of us breathe shallow breaths that restrict oxygen flow to the lungs and throughout the body, resulting in fatigue and depletion of our vital energy. Breathing is not only free, but it will set you free. Try this simple exercise: Sit on a chair with your back straight and focus on your breath. Take a deep breath, and then let it go, exhaling all the stale air out of your lungs. Continue for several minutes. Notice any sensations in your body. Eventually your body and thoughts will settle down, and you’ll emerge feeling more relaxed. Try to do this at least five minutes on a regular basis.

11. Stay hydrated! It’s important to keep your brain hydrated as well as the body. Have non-caffeinated, unsweetened beverages throughout the day, particularly water and tea. The rule of thumb is to have 48 to 64 ounces of non-sweetened, non-artificially sweetened drinks. Hydration keeps the body in proper pH (how acidic or alkaline your body is) and protects it from getting dehydrated, which is a cause of inflammation and other kinds of imbalances.

12. Meditate, pray, take a walk in nature. Take a walk around the block, even for 15 minutes.

13. Listen to some classical music, meditative music, religious music, etc.

14. Use aromatherapy essential oils such as lavender for an instant relaxing effect.

  • Use essential oils (lemon, peppermint, lavender, frankincense, bergamot, thyme, sandalwood, vetiver, myrrh) to boost immunity. For more information about the use of aromatherapy to reduce stress, improve immunity, reduce agitation, and to promote relaxation read chapter 18 “Aromatherapy” in “Calmer Waters: The Caregiver’s Journey Through Alzheimer’s & Dementia” by Barbra Cohn

15. Practice good sleep hygiene. It’s hard to function at your best and to stay healthy when you aren’t sleeping well. Here’s a quick reminder of how to improve your sleep.

Don’t drink caffeine after 1:00 pm. Limit your fluid intake after dinner so you don’t have to pee during the night. Turn off all electronics at least 30 minutes before bed. Cool your bedroom, but make sure you don’t feel. Or, warm your bed with a heating pad. Get black out curtains. Eat a banana; it contains potassium and magnesium which help reduce risk of muscle cramps. Or, have a protein snack such as a slice or cheese or tsp of peanut butter on a cracker to help maintain balanced blood sugar. For more suggestions read 16 ways to sleep better . . . so you can be a better caregiver. 

Best wishes for a happy, safe and relatively stress-free holiday season!


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Barbra Cohn cared for her husband Morris for 10 years. He passed away from younger-onset Alzheimer’s disease in 2010. Afterward, she was compelled to write “Calmer Waters: The Caregiver’s Journey Through Alzheimer’s & Dementia”—Winner of the 2018 Book Excellence Award in Self-Help—in order to help other caregivers feel healthier and happier, have more energy, sleep better, feel more confident, deal with feelings of guilt and grief, and to ultimately experience inner peace. “Calmer Waters” is available at AmazonBarnes & NobleBoulder Book StoreTattered Cover Book Store,  Indie Bound.org, and many other fine independent bookstores, as well as public libraries.